


A Moment of Breath

by Ramblingandpie



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Meditation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 23:59:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17497796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ramblingandpie/pseuds/Ramblingandpie
Summary: Lexi has a tough time getting the crew to keep their psych eval appointments. She catches up with Cora, whose stress levels desperately need to be addressed.





	A Moment of Breath

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kowbonez (digiplease)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/digiplease/gifts).



 

Sometimes, Lexi had to take things into her own hands.

 

She looked over the datapad in front of her and furrowed her eyebrows. Despite being in such close proximity to her crew, several were consistently overdue for psychological check-ins. Only Suvi, Kallo, Jaal, and Vetra were caught up. Suvi and Kallo didn’t mind the evaluations. Jaal found the process interesting. Vetra was the type to just get it over with.

 

She looked over her list and frowned as she began the triage process. Drack was most overdue, but would also give her the hardest time. Besides, Krogan physiology was particularly adapted to handling psychological stress, and his biometrics held more or less stable. Gil generally tried to turn it into a staring contest, and their sessions were not terribly productive. She wasn’t sure what Liam, Ryder, and PeeBee were up to, but per the current biometrics report, they all had blood alcohol levels that would preclude an effective evaluation.

 

She called up Cora’s biometrics display. Physically, the lieutenant overall kept herself in very good shape. She maintained a healthy diet and conditioning program. Unlike some other biotic crew members, who used their increased metabolism as an excuse to eat junk food, Cora largely stuck to the typical Asari commando menu. Still, there were a few concerning items on the report.

 

Time to hunt down one Cora Harper.

 

It wasn’t difficult on a small ship. As usual, Cora was in the bio lab. As Lexi walked in, she was examining a small plant and scowling at it. Lexi waited for her to set it down before interrupting.

 

“Hello, Cora.”

 

Cora looked up, startled. “Oh. Hi, Lexi. What brings you down to the lab?”

 

This next part was sometimes tricky. Lexi stood in the doorway to prevent escape. “Well, I was just coming by to check in on you, but maybe I can help with your plant.”

 

Cora sighed. “I can’t get the damn seedlings to take root. Every time I transfer them to a larger pot, they shrivel up on me.”

 

“Have you had SAM scan them to check for signs of disease?”

 

Cora rolled her eyes. “The point is to try to do this the old-fashioned way. Trial and error.”

 

“Ah. In that case, I might not be much help unless you wanted to look at them under a microscope. I have some excellent magnification tools in the med bay. If you prep the slides and bring them by, we can take a look later.”

 

Cora rubbed the back of her hand across her sweaty brow. “That might be a compromise I can work with.”

 

Progress.

 

“And while I’m here,” Lexi began, before Cora cut her off.

 

“I know why you’re really here. I appreciate you asking about my plants before launching into a scolding about my exam.”

 

Well, that part had inadvertently been made easy.

 

“No scolding, Cora. But you know I do need to check in with everyone. There are no precedents for the type of mission that we are on, and it’s important to keep everyone psychologically sound as we work together.”

 

Cora sat in the one chair and motioned for Lexi to sit on a nearby crate. “Go ahead. Ask your questions. Analyse away.”

 

“First, I do want to say how good it is that you are keeping up with your plants. I know that they are frustrating at times, but as you know I encourage everyone to work on a non-mission-related interest. And just being around plants is good for one’s psychological well-being.”

 

Cora rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Even when they keep dying.”

 

Lexi made a mental note that Cora was focusing on the negatives.

 

“They’re not all dying. The ferns are looking particularly lovely.”

 

“They’re also nigh impossible to kill.”

 

“Well. Still lovely.” Lexi paused for a moment. “How would you rate your overall stress level in the past week?”

 

Cora laughed. “You’re joking, right?”

 

“Not at all,” Lexi said. “And you can feel free to answer in as much or as little detail as you like. Remember, this is an evaluation, not an interrogation.”

 

“Really? Well, let’s see. The asari who I idolized for most of my military career turned out to not be the hero I thought she was. The ark itself, which I was hoping would be full of great resources and minds to help us on our mission, was largely in ruins. The adults and children aboard have been scattered to who-knows-where, and search teams are only just starting to find them. They’re all going to need loads of therapy. So, yeah, I’d say my stress levels are up there.”

 

There was a short silence as Lexi gave Cora time to continue. “I was really hoping that once we found the ark, things would click together and start making sense, y’know?”

 

“I understand, Cora. I was hoping much the same, myself.”

 

Cora leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees. “Sorry. I know you’re probably stressed about it, too. For all I know, you had family on the ark.”

 

Lexi smiled. She had always played fairly close to the chest with her own personal history. She didn’t want the crew to be worrying about her when really it was her job to worry about them, which she did constantly. Even letting Cora know her own hopes about the ark was probably too much.

 

“It’s alright.”

 

More silence.

 

Lexi continued, “But you did save the ark. There were still around 12,000 asari in stasis. They’ve started to bring some of them out and they’re moving into the Nexus and different colonies that you helped establish.”

 

Cora sighed. “That’s just part of the job. All in a day’s work, right?”

 

“Still, I think it’s something you can be proud of. You were instrumental in tracking down the Leusinia.”

 

“I suppose you’re right.”

 

“Something to think about, at least.”

 

“Well,” Cora said, “if I won’t go down in history as the human Pathfinder, at least I’ll have a pretty big footnote.”

 

Lexi nodded. “I know you were quite upset for a while about Alec not passing the role of Pathfinder to you. How do you feel about that now?”

 

“Not a problem,” Cora said, decisively, which almost took Lexi off guard. “The more time I spend around Ryder, the more I realize I don’t want it. Seems crazy, right? All the prep, all the training. I thought it was wasted.” She paused. “Alec made the right choice. Our Pathfinder handles chaos better than I ever could.”

 

That was good to hear. While Lexi expected some relapses into negative emotions as Cora went through the process of grieving for the perceived rejection, and grieving was not a straight path to acceptance, the fact that she had at least some time there was a positive sign.

 

“I’m glad to hear that you are coming to terms with his decision. Just remember that it’s not unusual for negative feelings to crop up from time to time on things like this. It’s normal, and if you ever want to talk about it, I’m happy to lend an ear. So to speak.”

 

Cora nodded. “Thanks. I think that’s about all my recent baggage for you to check in on. How’d I do? Still fit for service?”

 

“I really appreciate how much you shared with me today, Cora. I think that while you’re going through a rough patch right now, you’re handling everything very well.” And here it came. “There is one other issue I wanted to address with you at this session.”

 

Cora sighed. “These things are never as simple as they seem, huh?”

 

Lexi continued. “Humans are very prone to physiological stress reactions. Even though you are handling your stress on a mental and emotional level, it can still take a toll. I’ve noticed that your blood pressure has been elevated for the past few weeks in the biometric readings. Your sleeping patterns have also been disturbed.”

 

Cora snorted. “Is this where you hand me a statin and a sleeping pill?”

 

“That may be how things work in some human military units, but no. I assume that you went through Kelithzea meditation training during your time with Talein’s Daughters?”

 

Cora took a deep breath. “Of course we did.”

 

“I know it’s been a while, so I’d like to work on some of the meditation exercises with you. I thought maybe I’d guide you through the first house today, and then I’d like you to try to work on one of the three houses each day. You choose whichever feels right at the moment, and I suggest doing it as the last thing before going to bed. Try it for a week and then we’ll check in again.”

 

“It always feels like such a waste of time,” Cora said.

 

“It can feel like that, I know. But study after study shows that regular meditation and relaxation techniques increase biotic capabilities by up to 12%. Plus, there are the benefits on blood pressure, sleep quality, concentration…”

 

“Okay, okay. I don’t need a lecture. Let me get comfortable first.” Cora settled deeper into her chair and planted her feet flat on the floor. She rested her elbows on the armrests and folded her hands in her lap.

 

“Ready?”

 

“Ready.”

 

“We begin, as so many things do, with breathing. Six types of breath. The first is shallow, barely to the lungs.” Cora took in a few shallow breaths, and continued to follow the directions with a few of each type of breath as Lexi instructed. “Next to the shoulders. Good. Then to the upper back. Now filling the ribs. Next, fill your entire torso with as much air as you can manage. Finally, breathe deeply into the belly, making room for your lungs to expand downward, as though gravity is pulling your lungs and stomach downward. Excellent.”

 

Lexi watched the biometrics on her datapad as Cora went through the breathing exercises. Blood pressure and pulse were both becoming steady.

 

“Keep breathing as low and deep as you can throughout the rest of the meditation. You may find yourself drifting away from deep breathing, and that’s natural. Just gently move yourself back in the direction of breathing into the lower abdomen.”

 

“M-hm,” Cora said. “Got it.”

 

“Siari. All is one. You are a part of the universe, just as each of your body’s systems are a part of you. Many parts come together to make a whole.”

 

Cora continued to breathe deeply while listening to the familiar part of the mantra.

 

“The greater society, the community, and the self. Pre-birth, life, and death. By organizing and categorizing things, we can make sense of the individual parts and how they move through the universe. The philosopher Kalithzea teaches us to focus on the three states of matter that make up our being: liquid, solid, and gas. The first house is the liquid from which we came: the first aquatic environment of our evolutions; the wombs of our pre-birth; and the water and blood in our bodies.”

 

Cora’s breathing was slow and even at this point. It became somewhat shallower.

 

“I want you to focus your attention to your circulatory system. Notice the beating of your heart.” Lexi quickly did some mental conversions from asari to human biology. “Can you hear the rush of blood in your ears?”

 

“Yes,” Cora said, quietly.

 

“Breathe deeply and slowly. As you breathe, and as your heart rate slows, the rush will become quieter. Allow it to become a whisper.” They sat in silence for a few moments. Lexi looked at her datapad, and smiled at the numbers it showed.

 

“Our blood is connected to our origins. Consider the blood shared between mother and child, stretching back generation to generation, back to the time when our species were both creatures living in the water..”

 

Lexi appreciated that the similarities in evolutionary origin and physiology made the meditation possible to convert easily to human. She briefly filed away that she might want to someday work on a project of converting the meditation to Krogan or Turian biology. Not that she could imagine Drack ever consenting to try it, but maybe Kesh would be game.

 

“Now. Embrace the water. I want you to imagine yourself floating on your back on a vast, comfortable sea. The water is warm. It wraps around your body like a blanket.”

 

Cora mumbled something indecipherable. Her breathing became slightly louder as her body relaxed into the chair. Lexi internally congratulated herself on how well this was going.

 

“Now imagine yourself sinking down and becoming one with the water. You are a part of the water, just as it is a part of you.”

 

Cora’s breathing became louder and shallower. That was unusual, to say the least. Lexi looked down at her datapad to confirm the numbers. Breaths per minute had decreased considerably, and each breath was taking in less oxygen, but oxygen saturation remained unchanged.

 

The mystery was solved with the first light snore. Lexi switched screens to confirm. The sleep indicator confirmed it; Cora had well and truly drifted off. Lexi watched the rhythm of the theta waves march steadily across the screen.

 

It hadn’t been Lexi’s goal, but it wasn’t a bad outcome. The crew’s sleep log indicated that Cora was one of many crew members running a deficit. Too many late nights in the lab, trying to wind down from missions.

 

Lexi set the datapad down and stood up. She found herself yawning; it had always been difficult for her to lead the meditations without becoming quite relaxed, herself.

 

She quietly stood, and slipped out of the bio lab. Fortunately, most of the crew was busy so she wasn’t bothered by anyone as she grabbed some linens from the living quarters. She returned, and found that Cora’s head was lolled to one side, just as she had feared. That would leave her quite sore when she woke up if not addressed.

 

Lexi hummed an old asari lullaby as she gently tucked the small pillow between Cora’s cheek and shoulder, which should help alleviate any negative effects on the muscles. She then laid the blanket on Cora’s lap, making sure to tuck it in a little around her thighs so that it would stay in place. She couldn’t help but smile. It had been so many years since she’d last hummed this particular song to her own younger sisters and cousins, all back in the Milky Way and much older than her now.

 

As she left, she clicked the door shut behind her and set the lock to manual, so that it wouldn’t swing open just from someone walking by and Cora could remain undisturbed.

 

As far as she was concerned, Cora could take all the time she needed for her nap.

 

She returned to the med-bay and entered the notes of her evaluation. It wasn’t the way that she had expected or planned it to go, but a very positive outcome.

 

Now, if she could only find a way to get the rest of the crew to take regular naps, she’d be set.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2018 Mass Effect Reverse Big Bang test! Many thanks to Kowbonez for providing the lovely art of Ms. Harper, and to Azzy for running the Bangs!


End file.
